Born in Reading, the only son of Richard and Lorraine McNeil, Ebony McNeil grew up enjoying his boyhood, doing what boys typically love to do; playing outside most of the time, riding bikes, and spending time at places like the Olivet’s Boys Club, a place that was central to kids in the city of Reading.
He attended Riverside Elementary, Northwest Middle School, and Holy Name High School for a period of time, and graduated from Reading High School. He received an Associate’s Degree from Reading Area Community College, a Bachelor of Applied Psychology from Albright College, and a Master’s Degree in Organizational Leadership from Alvernia University.
While decerning his career goals and determining his direction in life, Ebony discovered his true passion along the way. “The funniest part, I never really knew what I wanted to do. I knew that I wanted to affect people,” he reflects on this time of discovery.
“When I got into the corporate world through banking and finance, I would lead teams of 60 to 250 people to excel in their performance and service. I did this by helping them realize their ability, even when they didn’t see it. I built bonds that helped them become better versions of themselves, which helped them also become better employees for me or elsewhere. But what I really liked doing was helping the people who worked for me, helping the people who had debt, helping them to be their best as a person; the person and the employee both win.”
Ebony continues, “I wanted to be many things growing up, from a football player, to an actor, and a rapper. I didn’t have an aim, but I had a heart for psychology and understanding people, which helped me to help them. I never really liked leading people in the business world, I liked helping people. Three years ago, I left the finance world. I could take any team and make them perform. It took me until the age of 40 to realize what I really wanted. I wanted to build an understanding of people, and I cannot see myself going back into banking. It was The Forge that allowed me to realize my true passion for helping people.
‘As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another; Proverbs 27:17.’
“Great things came out of Covid; I had a lot of time to think, and it was this time that inspired me to start the organization, The Forge. I was inspired to reflect on decisions made that I was not happy with; I was making decisions and did not seek any help. I said to myself, ‘Whatever you are doing, people will pay attention to you.’ My friends and I didn’t see one another, but we talked through phone calls. I was looking at my kids, wanting them to be the best they could be. It is hard for young men; I have four sons. I thought, I am not going to die knowing this problem. I had no plan, no money, no team, but on January 2, 2021 I founded the organization, The Forge, because I felt passionately that society needs strong men, and we need to do something about it.”
Society has long held men to standards increasingly difficult to navigate, without support systems designed to avert the growing mental health issues in men and boys. Support groups for women are plentiful and needed, but without healthy minded men, we are not able to break some of the cycles of heartache and abuse which affect women and men and their families.
As he began to formulate his ideas, Ebony’s mission became apparent, and direction followed. “I got lots of email messages, and I got lots of text messages, but I had no plan. I started writing down ideas and came up with the Three Pillars: Positive Imagery, Quality Fellowship, and Service. From there I started planning. In 2022 we became a 501c3, which allows us to receive grants and sponsorships to cover monthly meetings and marketing expenses. We have a board of directors which steers the organization committed to our purpose and our mission.”
“At the Forge, men are empowered to become the best version of themselves. We provide safe space for honesty, vulnerability, reflection, and growth. We create a space where men learn from one another, build accountability, and pursue continuous self-improvement together.”
During the formation of The Forge, many realities were taken into its planning. “We realized that there were plenty of programs for youth, but nothing just for men; something that came to light from the beginning. ‘If we can help the men, and break the cycles rolled over from the generations behind them, things will get better.’ We started doing monthly Men’s Forums every month to bring men together to focus on transparency, accountability, identity, and leadership. Our meetings are the fourth Wednesday of every month, and they’ve grown a lot, averaging 40 plus each meeting, who want to be better men, and feel that they have become a better version of themselves by attending. Our meetings immediately started taking off at the Hope Rescue Mission, and Alvernia University recognized that we were about to outgrow our meeting place and welcomed us in. We currently have a large meeting space with audio-visual resources at the John R. Post Center at Alvernia University.”
Coaches, counselors, schools, and other organizations have recognized the importance of the program and become part of the growth The Forge has realized since its inception.
“High schools started to see what we are teaching and encouraged the idea of teaching young men what we are teaching adult men. Kids are battling social media and other modern day pressures in our culture. If we can teach the youth earlier, we will not have to fix the men later. Schools were sending their athletes to the meetings with the mindset that these young men need to hear this now, and that men’s mental health starts so much younger. We talk about men’s mental health using a Christian biblical base at high schools and churches. It is very different and very impactful. The football and basketball teams from Reading High and Muhlenberg High Schools, ages 16 and up, are currently attending our meetings. It is a closed-door meeting which allows them to talk freely, and adults are required to participate with younger men to help navigate or prepare for conversations which are more difficult. Men’s mental health is directly linked to suicide, and we do a lot of impactful things which are considered the foundations of manhood for young men who are making decisions and taking paths in the wrong directions, helping them to pivot in the correct way. We help them with transparency, conflict resolution, and how to be emotionally intelligent. We have men from the age of 16 up to early 30’s to 50’s and older, who come consistently. All of them are getting something from it. Our culture teaches men not to share what they are feeling, and to figure out how ‘man up’. We provide an opportunity to be transparent in a safe place, and receive support from other men in a safe place. I am still very proud that nobody has ever discussed outside what is shared within the forum. ‘Counteract surface manhood and society’s toxic images associated with it, instead focusing on internal building of self, including faith, emotions, discipline, and self-control.’ The idea of positive masculinity has definitely taken flight!”
Ebony McNeil currently serves as Clinical Director at Berks County TASC, while running The Forge and EM Coaching and Consulting LLC. He has been coaching football and basketball for youth ages 5-13 for the last 15 years straight at Muhlenberg and Holy Guardian Angels, and for both sports at Berks Catholic High School. He and his wife Kelly reside with their four sons in Muhlenberg Township.
Please join The Forge’s big community event on Saturday, July 25th, at Jim Dietrich Park, from 12-7pm. Learn more by visiting theforgeforum.org or follow them on Facebook and Instagram – The Forge Forum.
For information on Monthly Forge Forums and Organization Offerings, contact Ebony McNeil at emcneil@theforgeforum.org.
